Ekphrasis Post - What I fear - Day 5 WEGO Health Blog

I'm participating in the WEGO Health Blog's 'Health Activist Writer's Month Challenge' where bloggers are asked to write about their conditions. The goal is to write from these 30 health related prompts for 30 days April.

This is day number five.
Ekphrasis Post. Got to flickr.com/explore and write a post inspired by the image. Can you link it to your health focus? Don't forget to post the image.

What I fear

Can you believe this is the image that I received when I went to flickr.com/explore? It is the first one that popped up, and I am a believer in fate, so I went there. I didn't click again for a different picture. Something in the universe wanted me to get THIS picture to write about. And it evokes a sense of dread in me and fear.


What do I see when I look at it? I see the hand of death coming for this woman. I do. And I hate it. Seriously hate it. He has his hands on her face, ready to claim her. He is standing erect, ready to walk off with her. He is looking straight into her eyes. He is here. 


The red dress evokes blood for me. The blood of many, many, many blood sugar checks. Every damn day. The tiny droplet that lets us know our course - are we high, are we low, are we in need of treatment, or correction, or none at all. 


Blood. Blood. Blood. I am so very sick of all the blood this damn disease requires every damn day.


She looks as if she is resisting. Pulling back.  Resisting the touch on her face. Resisting the whole experience. Resisting knowing the blood sugar. Resisting the flippin' annual blood draw that evokes screams and 'No, please Mama, no.'  The tiptoes, the body posture, the facial expression. It stiffens me, thinking of her. 


All the while, the red dress flies in the wind. The blood sugar flies to the wind at times, not giving a care that we have counted carbs, bolused, tried our best. Throw it all to the wind, I say some days.


I fear the hand coming for her one day. We all pass, I know that in my heart. My sweet, dear Grace, my third child, one of the three hearts I have walking around on this Earth, will too. Just not before her time, I plead. Just not before her time.