Friday, August 3, 2012

Fightin' 31

31. Thirty one.

That's what her meter read when she said to me, in a singsong voice 'Mom, I feel a little looooooooow.'

Beep.
31.

I immediately suspended her basal through her OmniPod PDM. And my brain goes into 'Did I overbolus for something at dinner" How the hell could she be 31? Ok, do I have the glucagon here? Yep. Crap. 31.'

I grab a juice, nectar of the sweet gods, and rip off the straw casing and shove that little straw into the silver hole.

Grace won't drink it.

'Mama, nooooooooo juice. Nooooooooooooooo.'

Huh??? NO JUICE? What the heck? She's never refused juice before.

And as I think this, her eyes get fluttery and begin to do a little roll back into her head.
And she starts to lay down.

'NOOOOOOOOOOOO. You MAY NOT lay down. You CANNOT go to sleep.
DRINK the juice.'

And she starts to cry. And mumble.

And I shove that little straw into her mouth and command her to
'DRINK THE DAMN JUICE. NOW.'

Sip, sip, sip. Grace starts to drink. I hold her head.

And I whisper in her ear.
'You are having a low. It's 31. You need to listen to Mommy. Drink the juice.
You need to help yourself. Help yourself. Mama is trying to help you.'

She finishes the juice. I let her rest her head against me. She closes her eyes this time, but she has one juice in her. I let her close them. I still do not let her lay down.

'Now we are going to drink another one. Now. Sip.'

And she does. She looks her blue eyes up at me and says 'Help yourself.'

Yes, honey, help yourself.

And if you cannot do it, Mama is here.

14 comments:

Alexis Nicole said...

I was biting my lip reading through that.

Damn 30s damn diabetes.

Love you.

Nikki of Our Diabetic Warrior said...

Oh Penny, I praise God that you were with her!

Diane D said...

Ugh, so scary.

Wendy Rose said...

'You are having a low. It's 31. You need to listen to Mommy. Drink the juice. You need to help yourself. Help yourself. Mama is trying to help you.'

And now I shall cry.

xoxoxo

These moments are so incredibly heart wrenching. You make a good team.

Lorraine of "This is Caleb..." said...

Hugs.

k2 said...

Love you both do much!!!!

k2 said...

So much, love you both SO much - Damn autocorrect!!

Cara said...

I remember my mom having very similar converstaions with me when I was a kid. :( Bless you for what you do for your daughter.

Sara said...

I don't know what to say, but just know that we are there for you every time that you are there for your daughter.

Jess said...

~big hugs~ That's rough.

Denise aka Mom of Bean said...

Oh, I was yelling 'drink the damn juice!' right along with you!!
So glad she drank!!

Stupid effing Diabetes!!

HUGS!!

Lydia Eiche said...

This is so odd. I just had a low of 39 on Monday, August 6. I'm 20 years old and I'm on the Omnipod too. I've been on it for 7 months and I reached the 1 year mark of my diagnosis in June. Sometimes the disease tries to take you down and it is scary. I'm glad you were there for her. I know I wouldn't be in the place I am without my mother.

Sandy said...

Tears filled my eyes because I have been there. "Drink the Damn juice" to my husband. I can't imagine it with a child but I do know the situation and the feeling. I have even gone as far as getting the juice in the straw, and dropping drops in his mouth if he wouldnt suck it up the straw himself. I hate the glucagon but sometimes I can't avoid it.

oneunitatatime said...

This reminds me of when I was little and my Mom had to convince me to drink the juice and not close my eyes. Now, it's my husband's job. To read about it is still so heartbreaking. Tears.